What if my ex-partner doesn't follow the parenting plan
Content
Introduction
It is not uncommon for an ex-partner to fail to adhere to the terms outlined in a parenting plan. Non-compliance can occur for various reasons, some of which may be justifiable while others may not. It is essential to assess whether your ex-partner had a valid reason for their actions. If the non-compliance is an isolated incident, such as your ex-partner being late to pick up your child from school, it can be frustrating but manageable, provided it does not become a frequent occurrence.
Open communication with your ex-partner is crucial to understand the reasons behind their failure to comply. Was it a one-time issue due to unforeseen circumstances, or is there a recurring problem that needs addressing?
Often, a dialogue can lead to a resolution. In cases where your ex-partner consistently disregards the agreements despite discussions, you may need to take further action. If it appears that there is no valid reason for their behavior, consider engaging a mediator.
Mediation can facilitate meaningful discussion and result in workable agreement. It is beneficial both during and after a divorce. Highlighting the benefits of mediation to your ex-partner may encourage their participation. Should mediation prove ineffective and you believe your ex-partner lacks justification for their non-compliance, you might contemplate legal action.
Be mindful, however, that court proceedings can strain the co-parenting relationship, which is typically not in the child’s best interest. The court will review the parenting plan to ensure it is legally binding.
What Does a Legally Valid Parenting Plan Entail?
To enforce the terms of your parenting plan, it is essential that the document is legally valid. A parenting plan becomes legally binding once both you and your ex-partner have signed it. This holds true even if you later modify the terms, provided those changes are documented and signed.
By signing the parenting plan, you are indicating your agreement to its terms, which you are then obligated to follow. The signature alone is sufficient; there is no requirement for court approval for the parenting plan to be valid.
It is important to note that the terms outlined in the parenting plan must not contradict existing laws or regulations. Any agreements that are in conflict with the law are unenforceable and do not need to be adhered to.
For example, if parents agree in the parenting plan that a parent who fails to pay child support forfeits their visitation, their mediator will advise them that this clause in their parenting plan is not legally valid. The parenting plan has to be changed to remove this agreement. Children have a right to visitation with their parents and that right is separate and distinct from a parent’s legal responsibility to pay child support.
A parenting plan is enforceable when it fulfills certain requirements in addition to being legally valid. For the agreements outlined in the plan to be binding, four key conditions must be met.
- Both parties must have willingly agreed to the terms without any coercion. If one party accepted the agreements under duress from the other, they are not binding.
- The parenting plan should not include any conditions that must be met before the agreements take effect.
- It should comply with legal standards, ensuring that none of the agreements conflict with existing laws.
- Finally, the agreements must be clear and straightforward, allowing for only one interpretation.
If these conditions are satisfied, you can request your ex-partner to follow the agreements.
It’s a good idea to first approach the other parent to speak with them about following the agreements. Start by asking genuine questions and remaining curious. They might be falling short of the agreement through no fault of their own. If your approach is sober, you can avoid an unnecessary escalation.
If talking doesn’t lead to action you could consider mediation and if that doesn’t yield results you can consider taking legal action but keep in mind that legal proceedings can further escalate tensions and hinder communication with your ex-partner.
The attorney may opt to initiate contact with your former partner first to assess the potential for negotiations. Alternatively, the attorney can directly file a request with the court, seeking enforcement of the agreements made with your ex-partner. Ultimately, it is the court that will determine whether your ex-partner is obligated to adhere to these agreements and what penalties may arise from non-compliance.
Consequences of Non-Compliance with the Parenting Plan
Non-compliance with the parenting plan carries specific repercussions. Should the court rule that your ex-partner is required to follow the agreements, it may impose a coercive measure, such as a financial penalty for each instance of non-compliance. In extreme cases, the court may even alter the primary residence of your child. This action may be taken if your ex-partner unjustifiably prevents you from seeing your child. In such situations, the judge may decide to temporarily place your child in your care. However, this is considered a severe measure and is not taken lightly by the court.
The primary expectation is that both parents collaboratively resolve their issues. Resorting to court should be viewed as a last resort. Ideally, through mediation, both parties can reach an agreement without the need for judicial intervention.
I am considering contesting the existing parenting plan. Is this feasible?
It may be that you are unable to adhere to the terms of the parenting plan due to changes in your circumstances.
For instance, a change in your financial situation might mean you can no longer provide the same level of child support.
There may be valid reasons for wanting to modify the parenting plan, even if your ex-partner is resistant to those changes. If you have made every effort to negotiate adjustments to the parenting plan with your ex-partner but have not achieved a resolution, the next step is to collaborate with your attorney to file a motion with the court.
The judge will then determine whether to approve, deny, or partially approve your request. Should your request be approved, the new terms you proposed will take effect and will be legally binding. Both you and your ex-partner will be required to adhere to these new terms. If your ex-partner disagrees with the court’s decision, they have the option to contest it. It is advisable to first attempt to reach a mutual agreement.
Remember, working together to modify the terms is usually more beneficial for both you and your child than engaging in adversarial court proceedings.
Resources
Here are some links to more information on the topics discussed above,
From Government.nl:
What happens to the responsibility for my children if I get divorced?
From Simmelink Advocatenkantoor:
Contact
Is some of this information incomplete or unclear?
Do you have a different question you’d like help with?
We’re specialised in expat divorces and we’re here for you, please write us at info@familymediationdelft.nl
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