Divorce in the Netherlands Explained
How to Get Divorced in the Netherlands | Process, Costs & FAQs
Table of Contents
Stages of Divorce by Mediation in the Netherlands; every separation is unique, but a clear and structured process can make all the difference. Mediation offers a calm, respectful space to navigate difficult decisions together, step by step.
Below is an overview of what the mediation process typically looks like, from the first conversation to the final legal steps. It’s designed to be thoughtful, transparent, and supportive throughout.
How Do I Get Divorced in the Netherlands?
Divorce is never an easy decision. If you’re asking yourself: “How do I get divorced in the Netherlands?” you might be looking for clear answers about the process and maybe some reassurance that you won’t have to face it alone.
The good news is: the Dutch system is structured, straightforward, and designed to help people move forward.
Whether you are Dutch, international, married, or in a registered partnership, here’s everything you need to know about how divorce works in the Netherlands.
Who Can Get Divorced in the Netherlands?
Divorce in the Netherlands applies to:
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Married couples
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Registered partners (with or without children)
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International couples — as long as at least one partner lives in the Netherlands
- Same-sex couples
You don’t need to prove fault or wrongdoing. Dutch divorce law is based on the principle of irretrievable breakdown of the marriage. That means if one of you believes the marriage is over, that is enough reason to start divorce proceedings.
The Divorce Process in the Netherlands
Here’s how the process usually unfolds:
1. Decision & Orientation
The first step is making the decision to separate. Once that’s clear, you’ll need to explore how you want to approach the divorce:
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Mediation: You and your partner work together, guided by a mediator, to make arrangements. Mediation is often faster, less stressful, and more affordable.
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Lawyers: Each partner hires their own lawyer to negotiate or go to court. This can be necessary in high-conflict situations, but it usually costs more and takes longer.
At this stage, it helps to gather important documents (marriage certificate, proof of income, mortgage papers, etc.) and think about what matters most to you moving forward.
2. Filing the Petition
A divorce petition must be submitted to the court. This can only be done by a lawyer — but if you choose mediation, the mediator prepares all agreements with you and works with a collaborating lawyer who files the petition on your behalf.
There are two types of petitions:
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Joint petition: Both spouses agree and sign together (simpler, cheaper, and faster).
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Unilateral petition: One spouse files without the other’s agreement. This usually leads to a longer and more conflict-heavy process.
3. Drafting Agreements
This is the heart of the divorce process: deciding how to organize life after the marriage ends. The main topics include:
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Parenting plan: Required if you have children under 18. It sets out where the children live, visitation schedules, schooling, holidays, and financial contributions.
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Division of property and debts: In the Netherlands, this depends on your marital property regime (community of property vs. prenuptial agreements).
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Spousal and child support: Agreements about alimony or financial support for children.
With mediation, these agreements are tailored to your family’s situation, which often makes them more durable than court-imposed solutions.
4. Court Approval
Once the agreements are ready, they’re sent to the court. The judge reviews them to ensure they’re fair and lawful.
There’s no need to appear in court. The judge simply issues a divorce decree confirming the arrangements.
5. Registration
A divorce only becomes legally valid once it is entered into the civil registry at the municipality.
Once registered, the divorce is official.
Special Situations: International Divorce
Many couples in the Netherlands come from different cultural or legal backgrounds. If you or your partner are international, here are a few things to know:
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If at least one spouse lives in the Netherlands, Dutch courts usually have jurisdiction. This means that a Dutch judge can rule on your divorce.
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You can choose for Dutch law to apply, regardless of your nationality.
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Agreements made here are generally recognized across the EU (and often beyond).
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Mediation can help bridge cultural or language differences, ensuring both partners feel heard and understood.
International divorces can be more complex, especially if one spouse lives abroad, but the Dutch system is known for being clear and efficient compared to many other countries.
Common Mistakes to Avoid
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Not registering the divorce: Remember, it’s not official until it’s in the municipal register.
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Skipping the parenting plan: If you have children, this is mandatory, the court won’t approve the divorce without it.
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Underestimating costs and timelines: Mediation is usually quicker and cheaper, but even then you should budget time and money realistically.
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Letting conflict guide decisions: High-conflict divorces often drag on for years. Mediation offers a way to stay in control and reduce stress.
FAQs About Divorce in the Netherlands
How long does it take?
How much does it cost?
Do I need a lawyer?
Can internationals divorce in the Netherlands?
Do I have to go to court?
A Final Word
Divorce in the Netherlands is a structured process. It doesn’t have to be overwhelming or hostile if you choose mediation. With clear agreements and professional guidance, you can move forward respectfully, fairly, and with less stress.
If you’d like to know more about how mediation works, especially if you’re part of an international couple, we’d be glad to talk it through with you.
Cost for divorce by mediation at Family Mediation Delft
Would you like to know what a divorce would cost with Family Mediation Delft? Review our packages on our Pricing Page
Resources
Get practical with our free resources:
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Download our Divorce Document Checklist
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Download our Divorce Process Infographic
Contact
Is some of this information incomplete or unclear?
Do you have a different question you’d like help with?
We’re specialised in expat divorces and we’re here to help, please write us at info@familymediationdelft.nl
Would you like to try mediation? Send us an email and we’ll set up an appointment for you.